OK, here's one for you. Jennifer Aniston plays Colleen, hardworking New York literary agent working to a deadline. Christian Bale plays Roscoe, the published author seeking representation. Roscoe queries Colleen, but she ain't too impressed and knocks him back. Roscoe's a tad upset and shoots off an angry email in response.
Incensed by the man's impertinence, Colleen publishes his email on her blog. A frantic Twitter campaign ensues, Colleen elicits haikus insulting Roscoe from her many friends and followers. Word gets round the writing community and soon everyone is taking sides on which of them is worse.
But here's the happy Hollywood ending. Roscoe hears about the haikus and comes round to sort Colleen out face to face. But the building is attacked by 9\11 style terrorists and they're both trapped on the 49th floor. Everyone was killed in the explosion and the stairs are blocked by fire. If they're going to survive this, they need to work together.
So eventually they get out after much bickering during which they learn to see the other's point of view and..well, fall in love of course. By the end reel they're signing a contract, he's proposing and there's a stomach churning montage of wedding photos a la Four Weddings And A Funeral.
Title? How about "When Egos Collide"?
Too schmalzy? Maybe, but then, real life ain't Hollywood. Here's the real version for those who prefer non-fiction.
4 comments:
My goodness, that's funny. Though also very upsetting that people like that exist!
Out of curiosity, I looked up Patrick Roscoe's website. On the home page is a photo of him with no clothes on...why?
The mind boggles.
I think more people should appear naked on their websites. Give us all a good laugh.
*In my best mother's voice* Sandra! Really, dear!
I've met a few Mr Roscoes on the internet. Hope I never meet one for real. I can't see a happy ending for the movie of his life at all.
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