Nearing the End

Well, I'm within grasping distance of finishing the WIP, or at least the latest draft. I've had to drastically rework so much of it it's really a first draft in places. But as the End gets closer so my metaphorical pen seems to get heavier and I find myself struggling to put words down. I don't know why this is. Part of me thinks, it's just weariness from working on it relentlessly for the best part of a year. Another part of me throws up the old paranoid doubts: the plot doesn't work, the characters are too thin and nobody's going to buy this pile of cack so why are you wasting your time when the sun is shining?

I won't know if any or all of that is true until I return to it later, but I want to finish it just so I can put it to one side and write something else. Funny how the grass is always greener when you're up against it. Usually by now I have another idea bubbling away but not this time; I want to choose a really special project so I'm taking my time over it. Rereading bits of John Truby's Anatomy of Story, he emphasises the importance of finding a project that has resonance on a personal level - a story you have to tell. The choice of what to write about is far more important than any other choice, and I think that's true. My stories all seem to have a common thread of isolation and self-delusion. Perhaps I'm trying to tell myself something?

Am I Alone In Here..?

Ever had the feeling you've been sleepwalking? That unsettling jolt you get when you walk into a hall of mirrors which is apparently full of people then find you're the only one there?

I've had a kind of epiphany about the true nature of internet forums this past week. Of course I'd always suspected there were fantasists and outright liars on these boards. Many people big themselves up to cover their feelings of inadequacy which is generally harmless in most cases and easily seen through. But what kind of person invents several fake identities for the purpose of manipulating and controlling the board, not for a few weeks or months but several years? Imagine the effort involved in maintaining the pretence. Each character has to be distinct enough to avoid detection. There have to be fake names and email addresses. It's more than a prank - it's seriously disturbed.

Of course sock-puppetry is not new. It has and is used for various reasons and not always with malicious intent, but let's not kid ourselves, it's always deception. The sock puppet is cagey about giving away their real name or anything that could make them verifiable off the board. With the internet it is quite simple to google someone and find them out. And most writers are keen to promote themselves and their work online, so why would a writer want to hide their identity? It's not always easy for the administrators to identify fake accounts. Anyone can hide their real identity by creating a new email account, and their IP address using an IP blocker. And some boards are too loosely moderated for the culprit to be spotted.

So why would anyone do it? This has given me much pause for thought. Creating a new identity and living it online gives a sense of power - the I know something you don't know effect. I would guess the perpetrator is riddled with feelings of inadequacy, like the practical joker getting his kicks from being the only one in on the joke. The fact that they can successfully deceive people gives their ego a huge boost.

In any case, it's opened my eyes to the fact that there are some very sick minds on the internet, and I'll be double checking everyone I encounter from now on.

Duz speling and gramer mattar?

Had the most surreal experience on a writers' board recently. Someone started a thread asking if anyone else was bothered by bad spelling and grammar in posts, a question which seemed like a no-brainer to me. I can't think of anything more basic to calling yourself a writer than mastering spelling and grammar, the nuts and bolts if you like of wordsmithing*. You wouldn't ask a motor mechanic if he thought nuts and bolts mattered, or a joiner if he thought wood mattered. It's fundamental, surely?

Apparently not. According to the luminaries on that thread it is snobbish to judge someone on the basis of their spelling and grammar. Content is all. Anyone who is turned off by technical faults is clearly an intolerant bigot. After all, isn't that what editors are for?

Ahem, I kid you not, that was the gist of it. Now, I'm all for content, don't get me wrong. Some of the most grammatically pristine prose is so dull and devoid of meaningful content it makes you want to pluck out both eyes in protest. But if your careless spelling and clumsy grammar keeps tripping up the reader to the extent they cannot get your meaning, or give up trying, you have failed in any case. Spelling and grammar are the hallmarks of a pro, or at least someone serious and thoughtful enough to have bothered proofreading their own work. I'm too old and grumpy to bother with slapdash writing. If you aren't savvy enough, or considerate enough, or capable enough to at least try to get it right then I don't waste my time.

And of course it helps to have something interesting to say. But that's another post.

*OK, so it isn't a word, but I'm taking poetic license. Damn spellcheck.

Big News - Big Bad Wolf is Dead

Official sources have confirmed that after prolonged action by Nato forces in the vicinity of Three Little Pigs Wood, the evil terrorist known locally as Big Bad Wolf has been killed.

"We had him surrounded for several days," said General Red R Hood who commands the Twelfth Pixie Division deployed in the area. "We were acting on information given to us by a number of diminutive pigs who had suffered harassment at the hands of this evil character for many years. Apparently he has been responsible for acts of destruction against their property and had it not been for the advanced technology of brick housing they might have all lost their lives."

General Hood went on to say how Wolf had held sway in the area for years and even attacked and eaten her own granny in a basket-related incident. "Luckily I arrived in time to save her and Wolf suffered an injury to the stomach yet still managed to escape. For some time we believed he might be dead until this latest atrocity drew our attention. It is a great relief to the fairy tale community to know that this evil character is no more."

Big Bad Wolf was bombed to smithereens by several hundred tons of explosive, removing any doubt as to his death, and any trace of forensic evidence.

Osama Bin Laden is 63.

Wills and Kate get spliced

Well the much hyped Royal Wedding went off without a hitch. I spent a lot of the morning reading the hilarious tweets about it and some of the comments cheered me up no end. It's nice to see that people are pretty astute and don't all fall for the publicity. It seems to me, as a casual observer, that the media were the ones most excited about it. I could only stand to watch about twenty minutes of the tv coverage and most of that with the sound off because the obsequious ramblings of journalists and so-called experts was bringing on my gag reflex. I sincerely hope non-Brits don't imagine this kind of grovelling is representative of Britain. What we weren't allowed to see were the hordes of riot police keeping any demonstrations well away from the cameras.

But that's them married and good luck to them. The track record of royal marriages isn't great, but I hope theirs lasts into old age. A good marriage is the greatest gift anyone can have.

If you were on the dark side of the moon and managed to miss it, here's the livened up version.

Censored

Well, after five (or is it six) years on writers' boards it has finally happened. A post of mine was deleted on Absolute Write Water Cooler. Yes, I'm still reeling from the shock too. Anyone who knows me knows I don't post Without Due Care And Attention, unlike some. Usually I agonise for hours before poking a tentative toe into a discussion - even then I mince my words so finely the meaning is almost lost for fear of upsetting anyone. I'm not a troll by any stretch of the imagination.

Of course I understand the need to edit - as writers we do it every day and only a fool gets so attached to his words he can't accept the process. But obliterating someone's opinion is a very dangerous road to go down. You may not like what others think, but even if you disagree it should be an opportunity to reevaluate your own opinions. As humans we need that outlet. Without the ability to express ourselves what else do we have? Terrorists plant bombs because they have no voice. They up the stakes until someone listens.

But don't worry, I won't be planting any bombs. This has however made me reevaluate my opinion of that board. Any place that has no respect for individual writers and allows the mob to rule is probably best avoided. It's taken some years, but I am learning.

Backstory and Royal Weddings

Someone very wise once said we don't know who we are now unless we study our past. That's why backstory has an important place in the stories we tell.

A few months ago, when the impending Royal Wedding was announced, I was somewhat astonished at the largely negative reaction I saw on the boards I frequent. Why would anyone react this way about celebrating a happy event? After all, William and his betrothed are young, glamorous and photogenic. It's an extra day off work for many people and a moment of glory in these hard recession-weary times.

But I too had those sinking feelings, and I know exactly why. Anyone who is old enough will remember the marriage of his father and mother, nearly 30 years ago. That too was a big production - Hollywood couldn't have done it better - and for months before it was all over the media. On the day crowds lined the streets and everyone tuned in to watch. It was sold as a fairytale wedding and it certainly looked like it.

In the years that followed people gradually woke up to the fact that it had been a sham. The groom was marrying to please his family and had no great love for his bride, in fact he was heavily involved with a married friend. Of course their personal lives are their own business, but what makes me bitter is the way the public, who paid for this sideshow, were completely lied to for years until the marriage ended in bitter divorce.

All of which serves to illustrate the importance of backstory. We need to know something about the background of a character in order to understand the story happening now, simply because events of the past shape us as people. Of course that doesn't mean a complete biography, and the skill lies in getting that balance between giving enough information with moving the story forward.

But never underestimate the importance of backstory in helping your reader understand who your character is today.